Self Diagnosed Borderline?
Question by Lisa Murphy: Self diagnosed borderline?
I tried to kill myself when I was 19 they said I had a personality disorder. Fast forward 9 years im.starting to think I have borderline. I wasnt in.the mental hosp long enough.to diagnose me and didnt keep up with.going to therapy because I didnt want to go thro with the act of actually wanting to kill myself. But I have been very suicidial since my early teens, I was abused.and neglected as a child. Im 27 now and have a slew of bad.realationships abusive or my usual I love you.i hate realationship. My last boyfriend was an alcoholic and verbally mentally and physically abusive and its because of him im realizing alot of stuff about myself. Ive forgiven him not going back but I want to.heal and better myself now that im relizing there was a reason I put.up with that. So where do I start? Ive seen a counciler but shes only a year.older then me dont seem like she has alot of wxperience and I end up talking the whole time but never.get answers. I havent been able ti keep a job for.long and.i need.to survive and.get so caught.up in emotion so any.suggestions? Thank you for your time.
Best answer:
Answer by gardensallday
Dialectical behavior therapy so far is the best treatment for suicidal or self-injurious feelings problems. Get a different therapist who works with a DBT program. Good luck!
Oh, I should give you my depression tips, too. Most of this is stress reduction.
Generic Practical Depression tips (PRINT THEM OUT):
Much of what people call depression is actually grief, or they are living in an abusive situation (bullying at school, abusive spouse or boss, chronic poverty in crime ridden neighborhood etc)
The library has self-help books on depression.
Many meds cause or worsen depression, including birth control, blood pressure, pain, acne, antipsychotic, anxiety (benzos) or sleeping medications, alcohol, illicit drugs and MANY others.
Hypothyroidism mimics depression . Too little sleep, or sleep disorders like sleep apnea, or interrupted sleep (crying baby, barking dog) can cause depression.
If depression is worse in winter, use a light box (10,000 Lux (light intensity) at about 20” – about $ 300 online, you don’t need full spectrum, Sunray is a good brand). I have extra windows, painted the walls peach & yellow & have a skylight. There’s a link to a cheaper lightbox & more info at psycheducation.org. Also you can try 1000 to 2000 IU of Vitamin D in winter. It may work, or may be placebo treatment.
Try meditation like progressive muscle relaxation or guided imagery. See The Anxiety & Phobia Workbook by Edmund Bourne. Free 15 minute guided imagery at healthjourneys.com and many free meditations at youtube.
Go out with friends, & if you don’t have any, join a club e.g. hobby club, bowling league & MAKE yourself go. “Isolating” makes depression worse!
Exercise 1/2 hour a day, & anytime you feel depressed or anxious. LOTS OF RESEARCH SUPPORTS THIS as the most effective depression treatment of all.
Insomnia?: Go to bed & get up the same time each day, even weekends. Don’t use your bedroom to watch TV, read or use the computer. Don’t do stuff that revs you up before bed, like exercising & using the computer. Light from computer screens & TV wakes you up. Blue light is the worst offender – dim the lights and use an old-fashioned incandescent bulb the last hour. Make the bedroom very dark, even cover up the clock. Mask disturbing sounds with a fan or try soundsleeping.com or youtube, etc. Avoid caffeine after noon.
Put colorful, happy things around the house. Do nice things for yourself. Make a list of things that make you happy, like: bread fresh from the oven, the crisp sound of a saltine cracker breaking, fresh sheets on the bed, touching frost on the windowpane, etc. Read that list when you are down. Use comforting scents. I like vanilla & cloves.
Work on time management if you are overwhelmed. Cut back on other responsibilities so you can spend more time with friends & family. Ask for help with chores.
Spend more time with your pet, if you have one.
DON’T listen to sad music! Listen to upbeat stuff- same with movies & novels.
DISTRACT yourself. Read a novel, watch a comedy, go out with friends, play cards or a video game, whatever keeps your mind busy.
Volunteer. Helping others makes you feel better about yourself & you make a difference, too. If you are religious, your religion may help keep you involved in the community.
Put a half-smile on your face. Changing your expression is proven to help change mood.
Try free computerized cognitive behavioral therapy at moodgym.anu.edu.au. Also, if you have an abuse history, it is likely to be a major cause of your depression.
If suicidal (not just “suicidal ideation,” but you are impulsive or have a plan), find a community hospital with inpatient behavioral health (yellow pages). Don’t call 911 unless you have hurt yourself, because the police come. They will dump you wherever they want, and that may be a horrible state hospital.
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